Social media is destroying kids and workplaces

I watched the new Netflix series Adolescence recently and couldn’t shake a gut-wrenching sense of doom. As a parent and someone who works closely with the next generation of employees, I already knew things were grim—but this series made it painfully real.

Let me be blunt: social media is destroying our young people.

Jonathan Haidt calls this generation The Anxious Generation, and he’s spot on. We’ve handed kids smartphones and unfettered internet access, and in return, we’re watching their mental health crumble. Anxiety. Depression. Addiction to scrolling. A complete lack of resilience.

And now this tsunami is crashing into the workplace—and leaders are completely unprepared.

I’ve seen it first-hand—with my own son

Last year, my then-11-year-old son was like every other kid. He had one of my old iPhones, and I thought I had a handle on what he was up to.

But boy, was I wrong.

He was begging me for TikTok and Snapchat because all his friends had it. I said no—I’d already made the decision that he wouldn’t have access to social media until he was at least 16. But kids are more tech-savvy than we give them credit for. He set up a TikTok account behind my back. And when I found it, I was horrified.

He was being targeted by multiple accounts sending him semi-nude images and trying to lure him to OnlyFans. He had also been watching Andrew Tate videos and told me Tate was “inspirational” for young men.

That was my wake-up call.

I locked everything down. He now has a flip phone. No social media. No YouTube. His iPad is locked tighter than a government vault.

But here’s the thing—my kid is a good kid. Smart. Kind. Thoughtful. And this still happened.

This isn’t about bad parenting or lazy kids. This is about an entire system that’s failed to protect our young people. We’re allowing their brains to be rewired by algorithms that don’t give a damn about their wellbeing.

What’s this got to do with the workplace?

Everything.

I talk about this in my keynotes all the time: Gen Z are arriving at work with underdeveloped social and communication skills. They’re anxious, conflict-avoidant, and terrified of human interaction. Many don’t know how to make a phone call or have a face-to-face conversation without spiralling. They lack confidence and struggle with feedback or pressure.

And we wonder why they ghost job interviews, quit without notice, or need their parents to help them negotiate a salary.

We didn’t prepare them for real life. We handed them a dopamine-drenched digital pacifier and told them it was normal.

The science backs it up

Jonathan Haidt’s research is damning. Since smartphones and social media became widespread around 2012, mental health stats for teens—especially girls—have plummeted. Self-harm, hospitalisations, anxiety, and depression have all skyrocketed.

The problem? We replaced outdoor play, face-to-face interaction, and sleep with Instagram, YouTube, TikTok, and Snapchat. We let Silicon Valley experiment on our kids—and now we’re paying the price.

Haidt’s four recommendations to fix this mess

Thankfully, Haidt doesn’t just highlight the problem—he offers solutions. And I’ve taken these on board both as a parent and an HR expert advising business leaders.

1. No smartphones before high school

Kids don’t need access to the internet in their pockets. Full stop. Buy them a dumb phone. Yes, they’ll hate you. Yes, you’ll be the “mean parent.” Be that parent anyway.

2. No social media until age 16

Their brains aren’t ready. These platforms are built to addict and manipulate. Kids need to form an identity offline before they start broadcasting themselves to the world.

3. Phone-free schools

Schools should be sanctuaries. No phones in class. No phones at recess. They should be learning, moving, socialising—not scrolling.

4. More independence in the real world

Let them walk to school. Ride their bikes. Make mistakes. Solve problems. Talk to people. Let them actually be kids again.

That means real-life, face-to-face interaction. It means letting them hang out unsupervised, figure stuff out, and deal with the world on their own terms.

I’ve pushed my son to do this from an early age. Ordering his own meals. Shopping for the family. He has his own debit card and feels like a grown-up doing basic, everyday tasks—and that’s the point. He’s had casual jobs during school holidays, earning his own money. He even ran a stall at our local market, selling old toys and books to save up for an Xbox. He did it all himself. And he loved it—because it made him feel empowered and capable.

These small, practical life exercises build independence, confidence, and self-worth.

He also has a daily chore list. Nothing fancy—just structure, responsibility, and a bit of discipline. And you know what? These are the foundations that young people need to be able to adult.

As adults, we’ve got to stop outsourcing parenting to algorithms.

And as employers, we’ve got to stop assuming young people “just know” how to work.

I get it. This stuff is hard. And I hear it all the time from parents—“It’s too late”, “I don’t want my kid to hate me”, “They’ll be left out if I don’t let them have TikTok.”

But here’s the reality: it’s our job to parent. Not to keep the peace. Not to be liked. To lead.

Unrealistic expectations at work

This dynamic shows up in the workplace too. Many young people expect their boss to be their number one fan, supporter, life coach and buddy.

This is not how life works.

Young workers are often left disappointed and disenfranchised because they’ve developed completely unrealistic expectations of working relationships. They think the company is there to serve them and their needs. This is being fuelled by an unhealthy wave of psycho-babble where accountability is dodged using pop-psychology buzzwords—think weaponised mental health claims, overuse of the word boundaries, self-diagnosed neurodiversity, or loosely throwing around bullying any time someone’s held to a standard. It’s creating a culture where feedback is seen as harm and expectations are treated as oppression. This phenomenon is coming directly from social media.

So, what can leaders do?

Here’s the tough truth: you’ll have to teach what used to be common sense. Like:

• How to have a conversation without a screen – remember, leadership is a contact sport
• How to deal with feedback without falling apart
• How to turn up on time, dress appropriately, and speak clearly

Don’t assume they’re lazy or entitled. Many of them are just scared and undercooked—because we never gave them the space or safety to grow up properly.

We need to build workplaces where soft skills are taught and modelled, not just expected.

And this is even harder in remote working environments. Many young workers are struggling to learn and grow because they’re working in isolation. Think about how much on-the-job training happens by osmosis. A lot of that is now dead and buried.

This is why I argue for hybrid working environments—if we’re going to give young people a fair crack, we have to bring back some level of in-person connection.

The low down

If you’ve got kids and you haven’t watched Adolescence on Netflix—do it now. And follow Jonathan Haidt’s work. This is urgent.

I’m not just talking as an HR consultant—I’m talking as a mum who had to fight like hell to protect her son. I’ve seen what’s out there. I’ve seen what it does. And I’m telling you—it’s worse than you think.

Childhood is being stolen, one scroll at a time.

But it’s not too late to change the story.